Writing in You magazine, Liz-fucking-Jones bemoans the state of her finances. The Inland Revenue are threatening to make her bankrupt, she’s £15,000 in arrears with her mortgage and has just paid £95 to have the punctures on two wheelbarrow tyres repaired. (Round these parts, whole wheelbarrows don’t cost that much.)
Oh, and she’s been reduced to borrowing the dogs’ shampoo when washing her ‘poor, badly home-dyed hair’.
Two days later, a miraculous financial transformation appears to have taken place as Liz sings the praises of her new hair treatment, a Brazilian blow dry that took three hours and cost £200.
Let’s just hope the lady from the tax office didn’t read Tuesday’s Daily Mail…