Crunch time in People biscuit row

You can take away our final salary pensions, you can take away our inflated expenses claims – but you’ll never take our biscuits, so the cry might go out at The People.

Word reaches me that free biscuits for all has long been a Saturday afternoon treat at the paper.

But apparently, one department head has caused uproar by depriving his team of their Bourbons and Jammy Dodgers… and locking the selection pack in his bottom drawer.

The sweet-toothed exec claims it’s ‘fairer’to keep them until during the week when more staff are in the office. Staff insist he scoffs the best ones and leaves them with the Malted Milks.

Last Saturday, when all but two of his team were at their desks, he still refused demands to hand over their
custard creams.

A source revealed: ‘It got very tense. Everyone else was munching away but they had to go hungry. There were even mutterings of a walk-out.

‘This week is crunch time though. They’re planning an ambush… and threatening to grab his Ginger Nuts.”

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